Ask Angel – Advice on Advice

How do you give advice to someone – Anonymous

Dear Anonymous, 

This is a tricky question; giving advice to someone is never easy. Just ask my friend. Every piece of advice she has ever given me has always led me into a worse situation or has turned out to be really helpful, which is strange, considering she never takes her own advice. 

First things first, who are you giving advice to? A family member? A friend? Personally, I think it’s easier to give advice to a family member or a friend, than someone you’re not that close to.

When you are giving advice never say what you think the person wants to hear. They aren’t coming to you because they want you to say what you think they’d want to hear. They are going to you because they respect your opinion, and trust that you will be honest with them. They are also trusting that you won’t tell anyone else, so if they ask you to not tell anyone, don’t or else you could lose their trust and respect.

One of the most important things to do, is to try to draw from your own experiences. I try to put myself in their shoes and see where they’re coming from. It just helps make the advice that you’re giving more authentic and less like you’re reading from a textbook. For example, if someone were to ask me, “How do I support my friend through a situation I can’t relate to/understand?” I would respond by saying, “Being there for them is probably one of the only things that you could do.” As cliché as that sounds, personally speaking, knowing that my friends have and will always be there for me has always given me a sort of comfort. 

Remember, when giving advice try and always put yourself in their shoes. Trust your gut and tell the truth, remember, they came to you for a reason. Don’t forget to pull from your past experiences. Please don’t be afraid to ask us more questions for the advice column!!!

Signed,

Angel ❤